Flush twice... it's a long way to Sally Quinn's place!

Pundit Pap for June 8, 2003
But, but, but... WMDs are just the "controversy of the week!"
By the Pundit Pap Team

June 8, 2003 -- WASHINGTON/NEW YORK (apj.us) -- The chickenhawks are finally coming home to roost.

Corporate media outlets have been playing down the scandal over Junior Bush's claims that Saddam Hussein was sitting on hundreds of tons of chemical and biological weapons. So far, nothing -- not one bit of actual weaponry -- has shown up. Earlier in the week, George the Petulant Prince, while making a diplomatic visit to Poland, claimed that the discovery of two trailers in Iraq containing what looked to be some sort of chemical processing constituted "weapons of mass destruction".

Problem is, the devices would be unwieldy if not entirely unsuited to refining chemical weapons -- and may have actually been devices for filling lighter-than-air vehicles (as in weather or surveillance balloons).

As the week progressed, more and more Democrats -- and even a few honest Republicans -- were expressing outrage over apparently being misled by the Chimp-in-Charge and his staff. Intelligence officials were saying that His Smirkiness and his staff had "twisted" and "distorted" intelligence on the status of Iraq's WMD programs and holdings.

So, naturally, Karl Rove sent Condi Rice and Colin Powell on a Sunday Morning damage control tour.

In the interest of keeping this report mercifully short, we're going to be briefer than usual, mixing and matching our observations of what we saw on ABC's This Week, NBC's Meet the Press, and FOX News Sunday with Tony Snow.

Because NBC has a long-term commitment to disrupting our regular Sunday viewing habits by broadcasting tennis matches, Meet the Press aired very early on the East Coast. We watched the program without the aid of a computer or a notepad, and were surprised by the tough but polite grilling Tim Russert dished out to Condolleeza Rice. As usual, he gave the National Security Bungler plenty of leeway to spin like a dervish, seldom really pressing Rice with any follow-ups. Condi, for her part, was not surprising -- she seemed stiff, overly coached, a little tense under the relatively mild grilling Russert conducted.

It was also noteworthy that she was conspicuously eager to push two spin phrases on the viewing public::

• She claimed that the litany of criticisms and outrage over the WMD scandal were "deflecting" from the fact that Saddam is an evil guy who used weapons of mass destruction before (hey, Condi, sweetie, nobody will disagree with that -- but daring to ask questions does NOT deflect from a fact that everyone in the world short of Saddam's family, childhood pals and mistresses think of the despotic thug)

• She kept repeating the phrase "revisionist history" in an attempt to dismiss and deflate the credibility of news reports that many in the intelligence community feel that their information was selectively used and distorted by Condi and her warmonger accomplices

• She also made sure that the phrase "connect the dots" was used aplenty -- this has been a favorite of the Smirk Misadministration since the Sept. 11, 2001 to drive home their effort to connect financing, logistics and planning of terrorist acts by Al Qaeda and similar criminal organizations, and its use in the context of WMDs is no doubt meant to fool Jane and Joe Average into confusing Saddam Hussein with Osama bin Laden (that's "connecting the dots" Karl Rove style)

Rice was outright evasive in the face of every Iraq-related question Russert asked; when she was not trying to deny that charges that George the Lesser and his inner circle were not leveling with the nation about the actual direct threat Saddam Hussein posed, she would trying to divert the subject by not-so-smoothly segueing into other topics, avoiding any attempt at a complete or straight answer to Russert's queries. Her main means of avoiding answers was to claim that critics of Team Smirk were "deflecting".

And Condi let this boner fly toward the end of the interview: "I'm not a very good long-term planner."

No kidding, Condi -- you dismissed Sandy Berger's warnings about terrorists threats to our citizens, adhering more to doctrine and policy than vigilance, concern and original thinking. You sold out our national security -- and if the Texas Twit had any cojones, he would have canned your incompetent, sorry ass immediately after nearly three thousand Americans were murdered.

Rice was also the first guest on n ABC's This Week, and George Stephanopoulos began the festivities with a move that can only be called merciful by first asking about this morning's "breaking news": a fatal attack on Israeli soldiers for which three fringe Islamist terrorist groups took credit. Rice gave the boilerplate answer about the need for Arab states to cut off funding for terror organizations. Can Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon dismantle "illegal" settlements by Israelis? (Now that is an interesting choice of words -- a journalist for the usually Israel-friendly ABC labeling some Jewish settlements in the West Bank "illegal.") Condi gave a long, lofty answer -- when she could've just said yes.

Steph then turned to Iraq, the no-show WMD scandal, and the big issue exploding out of it: the plummeting credibility of the US and UK. Steph used video clips -- the first of a pre-feud Little George making claims about a "growing danger" emerging from Saddam's Iraq, and a second of War Secretary Don Rumsfeld claiming there were "active" WMD programs and these weapons are "piled up". Steph explained that there was a Defense Intelligence Agency source who claims there was no reliable source or evidence that the WMDs existed as the administration has claimed. Condi, naturally, said that the intelligence squared with misadministration claims -- but based on her own claim of "classified" info. Condi then slipped in the "revisionist history" line, concluding by clamming, "We know that had them." Thankfully, Steph pointed out that little past tense dilemma -- did they have an active program in 2002? Condi, who looked like she was suppressing some sort of wriggling movement, gave a conspicuously uncomfortable answer, first claiming that there was plentiful evidence and there were multiple sources that said the WMD programs were being "reconstituted." (Of course, "reconstituted" can mean anything beyond setting up an office.) Steph hammered her, repeating the question about the DIA source; Condi whined again about "a kind of selective quotation [and] revisionist history," then used the same "connect the dots" nonsense that she used on Meet the Press.

Talk about avoiding a direct answer -- and sounding coached. Condi's biggest problem is that no amount of coaching seems to help that angst-ridden look on her face that seems to betray something less than an honest answer.

She went on to talk about a "very dangerous regime with very dangerous weapons." (Unfortunately for her, this means "George W. Bush" and "the US military" outside of our borders) Steph then played tape of Junior saying the UK had evidence that Saddam was trying to get uranium -- a claim that turned out to be false. Condi admitted it was not credible -- but part of a "bigger picture." (Again, an unfortunate choice of words -- anywhere else in the world, the "bigger picture" is that of a sole superpower using any excuse -- even lies -- to justify military action.)

Steph stopped her cold -- saying that people in the government knew the claim was a fraud. Condi tried to distance the top players from the facts. But Steph detailed a report by Nicholas Kristof that gave the lie to her claim. Condi's excuses started to sound lamer and lamer -- trying to claim that a false and debunked uranium report was a "data point."

Steph then played a clip of Smirk, during a speech, calling on FBI agents who know of wrongdoing to come forward. Should CIA people do the same? Condi deflected to the spin point that many in intelligence say Saddam was concealing a WMD "program" -- and went on for nearly two minutes before Steph said that she hadn't answered the question! Condi said yes, but sounded none too happy about it.

And so the interview ended.

And amazingly, Steph had managed to make an unnerved Condi Rice look even less credible than Russert. Expect the wingnut, hard-right "media watchdogs" to attack Steph for ripping the burkha of credibility off Condi Rice.

-- Morrie Friendly

When our fearless publisher asked me on Friday to "take a look at FOX News Sunday and let me know what you think," I was none too happy. I happen to like tennis -- and didn't feel like having to face arch-conservative Tony Snow and his merry band of Famiglia Bush apologists. Of course, he had to remind me that I was gushing over my Tivo about a week before and suggested I actually take a shot at recording the "Snow job" while watching the game and just take a look at the interview with their first guest after the game ("You won't have to suffer through Brit Hume during their panel segment").

So I did.

When Jeff Koopersmith described FOX News as "sham news," he wasn't kidding. FOX News Sunday is not merely political "journalism" and "interviews" with "attitude" -- it's an outright infomercial for the Rove-Cheney-Heritage Foundation Axis of Lies. But, as JJ and Morrie have pointed out, it is fast-paced and entertaining -- and Tony is a very slick interviewer.

His sole guest was Secretary of State Colin Powell, and together they argued the case that the whole "missing WMD" flap is terribly overblown

Tony started the show with the claim that "Democrats" are questioning the failure to locate WMDs. Spin: how dare they question the credibility of Feckless George? Fact check: so are many Republicans.

The first order of business was the attack on Israeli soldiers by terrorists dressed in Israeli military uniforms; Tony and Powell took great pains to inject Yassir Arafat's name into the mix; Powell, in particular, said Arafat has to speak out against terrorist acts and wants to see other nations put the screws to him. There was some back and forth about the "roadmap to peace" -- mostly to set the stage for Powell to proclaim that Shrub is "engaged." Spin: George is a peace-bringer! Fact check: where the hell has he been for the last two years?

Then, Tony turned to what he called the "controversy of the week" -- those missing WMDs. Spin: Roger Ailes and Rupert's other groveling toadies are going to work to turn the scandal into a "non-story." Fact: check: this has been THE major story outside of the US, and for well over a week.

Powell, to our incredulity, emphatically stated that he stands by the claim that Iraq had 100-500 tons of chemical and biological weapon. Spin: forget that a third of the world's nations have WMDs, we'll prove that Saddam is an evil evildoer! Fact check: it all depends on what the meaning of the words "has" and "had" are.

The most hilarious moment came when Tony and Powell tried to demolish the claim of one Mr. Thieleman, who has observed a tie between frequent visits to intelligence agencies by Dick Cheney and pressure to alter or doctor intelligence on WMDs. Powell tried to depict Cheney as merely "delving" into information. Fact check: Cheney is not an intelligence professional.

Yes, this is what passes as "fair and balanced" political interviewing on FOX -- an outright tag-team of ridiculous shilling and spinning that has little to do with facts or reality.

-- Jane Grice

Morrie Friendly gave up a career as a political consultant to become a management consultant and pseudonymous travel guide author. He retains close ties to top players in both the Democratic and Republican parties and lives with his dog in Georgetown.

Jane Grice is a graduate student whose studies focus on political science and commercial politics.