American Politics Journal

The REAL Ronald Reagan Memorial
A proposal to honor "The Great Trickler" in a manner truly befitting him
by Linda Starr

Tuesday, April 24, 2001 -- San Antonio, TX (APJP) -- There's been
considerable talk among some Americans concerning the possible ways to
memorialize Ronald Reagan and his contributions to society and our
lives.

As we look back on the real facts of life for most Americans during the
era of Reaganomics -- his vastly strange impact on the economy, the air
and water quality of our environment, and cuts to all social programs
bequeathed to us as Americans -- many funny and unusual suggestions have
been made.

Some of them are very sad for me personally, because I was old enough to
see through the eyes as an adult the horrible poverty, hunger, abuse and
tremendous need for medical care as Reagan's cuts took effect and people
began suffering terribly just to survive. Forget prosperity -- we're
talking a daily battle for many Americans to eat, find shelter for a
night, and not freeze to death. I vividly remember one story of a man
who froze to death in New York City after Mayor Rudolph Guiliani ordered
his police goon squads to clear the streets of homeless people, shut
down shelters, and run a man off a grate he had been sleeping on to get
some warmth (keep in mind that Guiliani was one of those same people who
often espoused the beliefs of the GOP's infamous "compassionate
conservatism" to justify his quest to make the streets safe for "decent"
Americans; I guess the GOP doesn't consider poor Americans as decent).

Like his hero Ronald Reagan, George W., the current Resident Select (who
is squatting in OUR White House as if he were a fairly elected leader
with a mandate instead of a dictator appointed by the Insupreme
Whinequist Five), is on a quest to see America revisited by Ronald
Reagan's trickle-down theories of economics. W's hope is to reinstitute
those very same polices and strategies -- which would result in similar
suffering all across America.

Loyal GOPers want to see Ronald Reagan's likeness carved (read: forever
imposed) upon a symbolic icon of freedom-loving and hero-Worshiping
people everywhere, Mount Rushmore. Many conservatives think it the
equivalent of a declaration of war when people who scoff at such an idea
laugh themselves silly -- or otherwise express outrage at the notion
that any "heroic" memorial should be erected in honor of this immoral,
economic degenerate.

Many Liberals and Democrats, wishing to place blame where it is so
righteously deserved, feel that the trickle down theory of Reaganomics
ought to be renemed the "Ronald Reagan Memorial Debt Formula." Many of
these people were victims of Reagan's policies as he slashed social
programs to the point where even executives became displaced. These
people were so overqualified for every available job opening -- menial
or otherwise. Many couldn't even find jobs flipping hamburgers. Huge
numbers of people from all walks of life wound up on the streets with
serious mental illness and no place to go, living out of garbage cans
and under highway bridges to find shelter from the harsh elements during
winter months of snow and sub-freezing temperatures. Hospitals were
closed due to funding cuts. Health care provisions dried up to nothing.
Some victims of the trickle down theory were people who merely lacked
adequate medications which allowed them to be productive members of
society, but lost everything without treatment. Government-instituted
safety nets designed to help people survive catastrophe were
eliminated. Even today there are Social Security Disability cases
pending from the punitive economic policy guidelines of the Reagan/Bush
era imposed upon disabled Americans -- draconian policies which
Clinton/Gore tried to help change in order to alleviate some suffering.

These facts bring me to a specific point. One night while chatting with
a friend, Jay, who dubs himself the "Contra Conservative," we began
laughing about some "Memorial" ideas we'd like to see named for Ronald
Reagan into perpetuity. Some ideas were not only irreverent and funny,
but if imposed would surely incite Republicans, the ideas being
downright insulting for all time to anyone so labeled.

The best suggestion -- the one which had us laughing until tears ran
down our faces -- evolved into an idea that could become a national
movement: the permanent painting of the likeness of Ronald Reagan on
every fire hydrant within our power to paint. The fireplugs so
redecorated would be named "The Ronald Reagan Memorial Trickle Down
Theory of Economics."

Imagine being one of the poorest souls driven to the very bottom by
Reaganomics ideas, theories, and policies. I submit for your
consideration... a place where the lowest among any society, our pets,
could relieve themselvesof their burdens. How many of us, in all
honesty, would not enjoy being a dog at that moment in time? How many
of us would like to see the looks on the faces of loyal Republican as
beloved family pets (and maybe a human or two) took a moment to "trickle
down" on the visage of Ronnie himself?

Can any of you describe or find a more fitting or just memorial to a man
whose policies inflicted so much needless suffering on so many of our
citizens? What memorial could ever present a more righteous blow for
poetic justice? Reaganites surely won't be laughing! They will be
outraged that their so-called hero will face the results of his tyranny
upon the weak now that he is said to be down and defenseless -- but
then, isn't this what W's Compassionate Conservatives mean to do once
again to all of us, this time under the guise of a tax cut for the
richest one percent of Americans?

I already have my template cut and a case of glow-in-the-dark Krylon
paint ready. Get ready, America! It's time to "honor" The Great Trickler
with thousands of new "Ronald Reagan Trickle Down Economics Memorials!"



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