American Politics Journal -- Pundit Pap



"The Pundits, Flush With Pride" courtesy the Wizard of Whimsy.

Sunday, April 8, 2001 -- NEW YORK/WASHINGTON (APJP) -- The big issue within the big issue this week: should America refuse to apologize to China over a mid-air collision that downed a Chinese fighter and forced an American spy plane down in Chinese territory?

Now, we all know that the real issue is whether the Cheney-Rumsfeld Axis should apologize to the world for using this incident to pump up international friction -- and the resulting defense contracts and arms sales that will make a handful of sleaze-buckets rich.

And we witnessed the unexpected return of one of our least favorite pundits to television -- in an entertaining shout-fest.

It was clear from the opening of FNS (Brit Hume was substituting for the vacationing Tony Snow) that FAUX News is treating the present situation involving a downed spy plane in Chinese territory as a full-blown hostage crisis without the actual use of the term "hostage crisis."

The reason? Help Snippy George ratchet up a new Cold War -- it's good for the bottom line of many FNS sponsors.

Hume welcomed Secretary of State Colin Powell, who said talks with China are "intensive... really moving along... [we want to] get to a stable situation once again." Hume said that there would be an exchange of explanations, and Powell actually said after reviewing the "regret" and talk that "We are sorry that this has happened" -- but the U.S. sees no reason to apologize. Was this a bone to Beijing? Possibly. Powell predictably attacked China for providing no information on the more than 20 American flyers on the spy plane within 24 hours of the incident, but seemed happy with access since then. Hume seemed upset that the Chinese are making their diplomatic communications public, and Powell changed topic, saying that there has to be a halfway point that would be agreeable.

Hume then asked Powell what was specifically said in a letter from the widow of the Chinese pilot who vanished in the spy plane incident to Little George; Powell refused to disclose "the contents of a presidential correspondence" but did say that George had responded -- which is a lie, since all of his correspondence is written for him. Hume huffily asked why the U.S. has not asked China for an apology -- ha, ha, ha -- right, with 24 of our servicemen being held in China, that would be real bright. Sure, the question was meant as "red meat" for China-bashers, but it sounded stupid in the context of Powell's diplomatic intent.

Powell said that the U.S. has every intent of continuing to snoop using clunky spy planes -- and Hume fumed over the Chinese self-proclaimed 200-mile limit and the possibility that the U.S. might respect it (as if, Brit!).

How much data and gear was the crew able to destroy? Powell was non-committal outside of saying that crew was able to do a great deal of work. Hume implied that the incident was engineered by China to force the spy plane down into their territory, and Powell said there has been a recent history of too-close flights. Hume essentially declared the incident China's fault, and asked, "Will they pay a price?" You could see Powell bristle -- because this line of questioning alone, from the "official" network of the Smirk regime, was surely being watched by Chinese diplomats. Powell would not play along.

Hume then brought up the question of whether Powell will request that China join the World Trade Organization. Powell said that the incident has damaged their chances -- but the damage can be undone.

Here's the truth -- the damage will be undone with help from the U.S., because China is a de facto growing consumer society. Sure, it's run by a proto-fascist military-civilian oligarchy --but the truth is that they've tossed Mao's Little Red Book in favor of the Harvard Business Review.

Hume ran a line from what he called FAUX's "sister" publication, The Weekly Standard, that called the present situation an "humiliation." Powell's response: "Compared to what?" Ha, ha, ha -- we loved it -- Powell slamming Murdoch's RNC-friendly rag!

The last question to Powell concerned "silence" in the rest of the world over the incident; Powell said that the UK had been working to help resolve the crisis. But this masked the truth: most other nations do not trust the usurper in the White House and are reluctant to lend a hand in light of rumblings of Cold War posturing. Most other nations question Pretender George's legitimacy. Most other nations resent his refusal to back the Kyoto protocols -- and see him as Polluter Numero Uno. And most importantly, most other nations see Smirk as an incompetent, mentally-limited puppet of right-wing handlers.

No wonder most of the rest of the world is silent. They're appalled at the takeover of the U.S. executive branch by evangelical, oil-loving Neofascists.

Hume's next guest: Senate Majority-Leader-in-Waiting Tom Daschle. Hume sarcastically asked Daschle why, if he considered the Senate's cut-down tax cut a victory, did he vote against it? Daschle called it win-win -- but made a point that Dems want to pay down the national debt. Mort Kondracke called it a victory for George the Lesser, but Daschle said that Dems are comfortable with a $1.2 trillion cut as opposed to $1.6 trillion -- and a fairer distribution of the cut. Mara also said that Dems have caved -- and the truth is, Daschle was not persuasive in saying otherwise -- all he could say is that "other priorities" are now in play, including giving the bulk of a cut to working people.

What about the priority of exposing the theft of an election, Tom? It's time to start now -- even before either Thurmond or Helms kicks the bucket.

Daschle was playing the "uniter, not a divider" card himself, talking about bipartisanship in the Senate and compromises on a number of issues. Fred "The Sleaz-le" Barnes asked if he would talk about a $1.2 trillion cut with Snippy himself -- and Daschle said that the GOP got beat on their plan. He did concede that it could have been easier, and that the education reform to come out of the Senate will be bipartisan. Barnes said Smirk has proclaimed that nobody should pay more than a third of their income in taxes -- and Daschle pointed out that most rich people don't even come close to paying a third of their income in taxes!

Talk turned to defense spending. Daschle favors an increase in pay for service-people. Mara asked Daschle how Dems feel about Smirk's handling of the spy plane crisis -- "after all," GOPers were very critical of President Clinton on many issues. This was a loaded question -- she knows that Dems do NOT play politics with this sort of crisis, and Daschle did not.

This would have been a prime moment for Daschle to applaud Powell's diplomacy and slam the bellicose attitude from others in the executive branch. Fred, acting as if Daschle was a pinko, as much as challenged Daschle to say China was at fault. Daschle pretty much said, well, no duuuh, you idiot -- China screwed up. So did Barnes -- framing Daschle as some kind of ultra-lefty just did not work.

This Weak
Speaking of apologies... will ABC apologize to the U.S., China, and WWII vets for George Will?

Once again, we caught the second half of This Weak -- as the round table of mediocre has-beens began. The topic: should America apologize to China? Sam Donaldson and George Stephanopoulos were debating the results of some meaningless poll, and Sam hit on the possibility of a consumer boycott of Chinese goods.

Yeah, sure, George -- let's see if TV sponsors whose goods are made in China tolerate talk of such an organized boycott -- which would need to be promoted by the media, after all.

Steph said that the hard line from the Chinese is a result of the Chinese leadership seeing the change happening under their nose -- and the need to maintain the illusion of a strong leadership. Cokie pointed out that China's buying a lot of hardware from Russia -- and Vladimir Putin has essentially bought the media there. She sees China on a "Cold War" footing. She sounded like an Ari Fleischer sock puppet. George Will said that should there be a "Communist show trial," that would be trouble.

Ha, ha, ha -- as if China would be dumb enough to go that far! Don't count on it, Swill.

Sam turned to the budget resolution and the Senate tax cut. Steph said the surplus is likely overstated -- and the Bogus POTUS isn't exactly putting a cap on spending. George Will slammed "psychotherapy" as some sort of liberal religion as he declared GOP victories in both houses -- talk about needing a shrink! Cokie said that the GOP could have actually won both houses -- and Steph said that we can expect Snippy to raid Medicare and Social Security. Cokie said that would be GOP suicide (as if people actually pay attention to these things). Sam asked if there is still bipartisanship in Congress -- and Will lied by saying that 30% of Democrats in the House voted with George the Lesser.

Hey, Will, they know that the bill won't pass the Senate. This way they can claim "bipartisanship" and win.

Steph smiled as he said that His Fraudulence's "signature" education idea -- vouchers -- is dead.

After the break, Sam gave George Will a chance to show his contempt for the men who saved the world -- veterans of World War II -- by saying that there should not be a monument on the Washington Mall. He said that there's an "entitlement mentality."

Good grief -- we can think of an even better example of the "entitlement mentality": the Bush Family. Look at the present occupant of the Oval Office: he got into Yale despite crappy grades in prep school because he's a Bush; he got slipped into the Texas Air National Guard, displacing a qualified candidate because he's a Bush; he avoided punishment for going AWOL (but NOT getting busted down to an enlisted man) because he's a Bush; he tanked three companies but got rich -- and got away with it -- because he's a Bush. Now he thinks he's somehow entitled to lead this nation despite a lack of mandate and a lack of a legitimate election victory as his allies broke laws and manipulated the courts to appoint this Usurper Boy in the presidency.

We don't see George "Mister Migraine" Swill whining about THAT example of "entitlement mentality."

Issue one: "Dealing with the Dragon" -- as the spy plane incident "exploded into the headlines." John McLaugh-In said that China broke treaties by holding the crew and boarding "the sovereign plane."

Ha, ha, ha -- you mean just the way the U.S. has rifled through every MIG that has landed in Allied territory? John fretted over the future of "MFN" status in China. "How much has this hurt China?"

Then John unleashed a shocker: he introduced Pat BuKKKanan, who is back on the far right of the McLaugh-In Group. That's right: failed presidential wannabe Pat can't get a real day job on a legitimate network, so he has returned to our favorite fringe sanity situation comedy!

The result: The McLaugh-In Group is almost as funny -- and even more inane -- than it's main competitor, Comedy Central's zany That's My Bush!

Pat declared the incident a failure for Shrub! Eleanor said Pat represents a feather -- no longer a wing -- of the GOP (a great comeback), and that China wants to enter the world community and get the 2008 Olympics, so there is an expectation on both sides of the aisle that it will be settled. Tony Blankley said the issue will be forgotten a month from now, and there is pressure in both parties to maintain trade relations. John asked if the international community is supporting China, and Larry O'Donnell said that the spy missions are a Cold War relic in the eyes of the rest of the world -- it's crazy to risk these flights. Tony shouted that satellites cannot pick up radar and the Chinese have new Russian ships (but forgot that there are other ways to monitor all of these than satellites and spy planes). Isolationist Pat wants Smirk to recall our ambassador and suspend PNTR -- "the Communist Chinese [are] acting like a Cold War power." Ha, ha, ha -- then he said if Slobodan did this, we'd be bombing Belgrade! There was much hand-wringing about China making uniform parts for the U.S. military.

We loved the lunacy. Welcome back, Pat! You're surely the poster child for conservative birth control -- but your presence on McLaugh-In has restored much of the hilarity that Michael Barone and Larry Kudlow just cannot deliver! And if you're so upset about Chinese clothing makers, ask Tom DeLay to talk to his sweatshop-owning friends in the American Marianas -- maybe they can come up with a competitive bid!

Issue two: the Americas and free trade. John talked about the possible expansion of NAFTA to most of North and South America. Eleanor thinks that most GOPers are free-traders, but some Dems and GOPers may fight it. She also pointed out that the "bipartisan" Smirk lost to the Senate on the tax cut issue. Tony called it a win for the GOP, but Larry said the GOP is terrible about declaring victory. Pat fretted about Jiang Zemin -- the Chinese, he said, are handling trade issues very well; John said that Pat sees no problem with trade shifting from China to the Americas. As Eleanor explained the problems Jiang faces, Pat accused Eleanor of being the Ambassador from China -- and said tariffs are out of control in South America. Eleanor thinks Snippy will get expanded trade with South America.

Issue three: Barbra Streisand! John said that Barbra sent a memo slamming wimpy Democrats -- and slamming the GOP overall. John said she's onto something, citing Robert Reich's criticism of a "dead party." Emphasizing Reich's claim that Clinton is "utterly disgraced" and the DLC being "anti-union." "It's not playing dead --it IS dead." Larry O'Donnell said Reich does not hark back to "liberal glory days" because Clinton was no liberal, especially on fiscal issues. Tony quoted hate radio mogul Rush Limbaugh -- "it's b.s., Barbra Streisand" -- and agreed with Reich. Eleanor needled Tony, who had NEVER agreed with Reich -- and said that Dems are likely to take back mayoral offices, governorships and House seats. Pat said that the GOP will lose both houses in 2002 -- the first sane thing he's said this year! John said that Reich is engaging in disinformation! Ha, ha, ha -- with Pat back, conspira-craziness prevails at the McLaugh-In Group!

And speaking of craziness: there was just one closing prediction! Pat said "the almighty dollar will crash like NASDAQ" during the Smirk Regime.

Defeat the Press
Oh, no! The Tim Russert Show welcomes Chancellor Cheney

We caught the first half-hour of Defeat the Press. Guest one: a Russert favorite -- Dumb-yuh's brain, Dick Cheney.

"When are the 24 Americans coming home?" Cheney of course could not give an answer other than "fairly soon... every day that goes by [without resolution] raises risk to our relationship." Will there be an apology? Dick said that Little George has already expressed regret. How does he respond to the letter from the dead Chinese pilot's widow calling him a coward? Cheney said the woman is going through the roughest time of her life. Cheney then bored us with an official recounting of the incident -- but made it clear that this is "not a hostage issue" and that inflammatory rhetoric should be avoided.

How much of the gear and data on the spy plane had been destroyed? Cheney said that the crew had 20 minutes to destroy it. Tim said Chinese had boarded the plane -- and Cheney corrected him, saying "We have every reason to believe they have boarded the plane."

Then Tim pulled up the same quote we saw on FNS from The Weakly Standard -- that the present situation is a "national humiliation." Cheney sneered. "Looks like William Kristol is trying to sell magazines!" Ha, ha, ha -- the fact is, Kristol and Cheney are on the same wavelength -- they both want to jack up the defense budget and infrastructure, and this "humiliation" is just the way to do it -- but Cheney looked genuinely pissed off. Cheney was doing his damnedest to be diplomatic and ease up on the tough talk of the past week on Defeat the Press, but Tim Russert had forced him to respond to the Cold War desires of a fringe Murdoch-owned magazine, which Cheney was forced to denounce as "disreputable commentary."

Should we arm Taiwan? Cheney avoided an answer, saying the president would make that decision. In other words, "yes, a whole lot." Tim claimed that not going forward is a sign of weakness, and Cheney repeated his answer -- it's Little George's call (as if!). Tim said that the Chinese are building up their military presence near Taiwan. Cheney said that any disputes must be resolved peacefully. Will America come to the aid of Taiwan? Cheney was noncommittal -- just mentioning a long-standing relationship with Taiwan.

Now, we know Cheney wants to arm Taiwan, but now is not the time to say so -- so it sounds to some like a back-down. What would Pat BuKKKanan think?

What about surveillance flights, asked Tim? They're worth the risk, and we have the right to be in international space, said Cheney -- it's part of the relationship between nations.

Last year, recounted Tim, the Chinese defense minister said war is inevitable. Cheney said he was not sure what the defense minister was referring to -- and Tim had to tell Cheney: the U.S. Cheney dismissed the statement. Then Tim ambushed Cheney with two video bites: Little Shrubya saying China's a competitor, not a partner -- then fumbling over saying that they are a "strategic partner, er, strategic competitor." Cheney whined about "parsing words" and said that the spy plane crew will come home. Each day that the situation drags out hurts relations. Tim asked why George doesn't pick up the hot line and resolve the situation -- and Cheney said that Zemin's in Latin America this week!

Then Tim put Cheney on the defensive, as he quoted Reuters copy that characterized the Senate tax cut bill as a Democrat victory. Cheney expounded at length why it was a GOP victory -- and said that the cut would be over $1.2 trillion. Tim then quoted the New York Times showing how the Shrub budget leaves children behind -- cutting child care, education, and anti-abuse. Cheney whined about the "unfriendly" Times. What a laugh -- he and Bill Clinton actually agree on something.

Tim also asked about setting aside money for prescription programs -- and Cheney seemed a little confused after he was reminded he did a tiebreaker vote on the issue. Cheney deflected, talking about the legislation having "set ceilings."

Tim then turned to AIDS in Africa -- millions dead, millions infected. Tim said that this is the worst health crisis since the bubonic plague and the U.S. will need to come up with a billion bucks a year for the next three years. Cheney said that education and prevention are also issues, and "the president" agrees it is a terrible tragedy -- but would not answer Tim specifically on numbers.

Tim then cornered Cheney on the environment, mentioning the Sierra Club Smirk "baseball card" and his broken promises on the Kyoto treaty. Cheney lied -- saying the Kyoto treaty was dead before the Smirk posse rode into town, and that they are now "reviewing the science" on greenhouse emissions.

In other words, they are looking for "Weird Science" that says there's no global warming. Cheney also lied, saying there's not the money to deal with the standards for drinking water Clinton wanted. Cheney whined about a ban on new roads "slamming the door on legitimate activities" and hobbling local government (in other words, preserving nature and stopping the destruction of the environment).

Cheney then issued an ultimatum -- by saying that either there will be drilling or there will be rolling blackouts. This is ominous -- Cheney and George Dumb-Yuh have direct and close ties to companies and people that manipulate power and fuel supplies. Can you say extortion?

Cheney also wants to increase the number of nuclear plants. Tim asked if Cheney would be willing to store nuclear waste in Wyoming or Texas -- we laughed out loud as Cheney said, "It has to be stored someplace" -- and a hint of a sneer at Tim crossed his face.

Will George sign a campaign finance reform bill? Cheney said he wants to sign a campaign reform bill -- but demurred when Tim asked him about the Senate bill.

Tim then helped "legitimize" the theft of the presidency by asking about the dishonest Miami Herald headline that wrongly declared Bush the "winner."

Then talk returned to reopening Pennsylvania Avenue around the White House. The new regime had talked about reopening the area -- but now Cheney says there are real security concerns.

Finally, Tim turned to Cheney's health. Cheney said that he's lost weight -- and the while he's not a "green," he's eating a lot of greens.

Tim's next two guests were pretty dull: Senators Dick Shelby (R) and John Edwards (D). They covered the same territory we've seen all morning. The message: China has a lot to lose by prolonging the present debacle, there should be no apology to China, we have issued statements of regret. How long does the Cheney team have to get the crew back before Congress starts complaining? Shelby said two weeks -- the duration of their recess. Tim actually called the present situation a "hostage crisis" -- and Edwards, although saying "we stand with the president," did not call Tim on his words.

Tim then turned to the defense of Taiwan -- and a possible military showdown between China and Taiwan. The question of whether the flights are necessary also came up -- and Edwards said that the flights should continue; Shelby agreed. Tim began throwing out retaliatory ideas -- oppose the 2008 Olympics, cancel trade agreements, recall our ambassador. It was as if Tim wants the crisis ratcheted up -- not one word from Tim on diplomacy.

Now, we all know that the pundits like to give the floor to guests -- and that they should play devil's advocate fairly. Russert was doing neither -- it was as if he was asking, "Why not a New Cold War? Why not a New Cold War? Why not a New Cold War?" as many ways as possible.

Talk turned to the Senate tax cut bill. Yawn. Tim said Edwards allied himself with numbers closer to Little George than Gore; Edwards said that the fairness of the Senate tax cut bill sold him.

Both Edwards and Shelby are pro-nuclear-power -- and want a "national energy policy."

There was a final, confusing exchange between Tim and Edwards about some college sports tournament -- and nothing, but nothing, makes us reach for the remote more quickly than seeing the pundits shift away from policy spin to talk suited to ESPN!

We had expected to see more talk of the fake Miami Herald "proof" that George W. Bush "won" Florida. We did not catch the second half of FNS, but we were surprised that Dick Cheney, of all people, did his best to dispose of the topic as fast as he could.

One source close to the top of the executive branch have told APJ that the issue of the stolen election has a large number of people on Team Smirk worried -- especially because they see inevitable trouble the moment the Democrats get a majority in the Senate.

We say the Senate Dems should not wait out the so-called "GOP death watch" -- and should begin asking the big questions now.



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