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Mar. 19, 2000 -- WASHINGTON -- So many issues, so little time!
Bush and Gore "clinched" the candidacy on what one wag called "Superfluous Tuesday." Wayne LaPierre, the real head of the NRA, verbally cast Bill Clinton as a murderer. There was another controversial shooting by a New York City cop. A strongly pro-independence party won Taiwan elections. And presidential TV ads are starting to turn up...
LaPierre himself turned up on three shows -- and became the weeks top topic.
Here's what we saw:
Fox Noise Sunday
Tony Snow's first guest: Rudy Giuliani.
Tony surprised us all by confronting Rudy with the issue of yet another police shooting, and Rep. Charles Rangel's harsh words. Rudy was immediately on the defensive. He tried to defend the cop who did the shooting by claiming the victim was a crook with a record -- and attacked the cop! "Shouldn't the public know that?"
Yes -- the public should also know that there are other ways to subdue violent miscreants. Killing them is not exactly the only option.
And Brit Hume nailed Rudy for claiming the victim was a crook -- in that these facts would come out during the legal process. Again Rudy said, "Shouldn't the public know?" Rudy slammed the press for being critical of the cops.
Wow. No mercy at the outset from the Fox News Sunday crew! This was likely retaliation for Rudy's lukewarm support of Dubya -- Fox News talks, acts and reports as Bush Jr. cheerleaders. But heck, we loved it anyway. Rudy was forced to stay on the defensive, practically shouting his answers in that high, shrill voice he reverts to when under attack.
Rudy concluded by saying that "the people should withhold judgment" and stop protesting violent cops. He defended the cops -- and this writer will tell you from his own experience that the vast majority of New York cops are honest, hardworking men and women. Of course, there are a few bad apples -- and Giuliani's rhetoric is a "green light" to them to continue their abusive behavior.
Hume then threw Rudy a bone: "Is Al Sharpton a legitimate spokesman?" Rudy attacked Sharpton as an anti-Semite and a Tawana Brawley supporter -- but said nothing about Sharpton's toned-down rhetoric of recent years and condemnations of anti-Semitism. Rudy is essentially lying about Sharpton.
Hume also asked Rudy about -- the nation's China policy in the wake of Taiwan elections! Rudy gave the rote GOP answer (damn mainland Commies). Tony asked about oil prices (and mentioned Schumer's support for tapping strategic reserves. Rudy gave the rote GOP answer (he blamed Clinton personally and lied about Bill Richardson, whom he wrongly claimed said Clinton was "napping" on the issue).
Well, at least he doesn't sound like a parrot as DumbBellYou does.
Following the break -- NRA laughingstock Wayne LaPierre. He claimed that the Clinton spin machine" was "attacking" him. Wayne talked about the shooting of a cop by "violent felon...H. Rap Brown," whom he convicted on Fox News Sunday.
LaPierre has no shame -- exploiting the death of a cop to make it safe for thugs and drug dealers to get guns easily.
LaPierre lied about gun prosecutions, blaming Clinton for a "drop" -- when his own organization lobbied against federal funding for gun prosecutions. Tony should have had the stones to point this out -- but he did retort by mentioning that J.C. Watts and G.W. Bush both slammed LaPierre. LaPierre said that he would make guns an issue.
Tony: "So you have no apology."
Wayne: "No apology."
Wayne called for expansion of "Project Exile" programs that he forecast would cut gun homicides in half. But the program is flawed and still keeps it easy for thugs to get guns.
Tony asked Wayne about his reaction to the Smith and Wesson settlement -- and he slammed it. He did concede that smart gun tech is supported by the NRA.
Tony then asked Wayne about his comment claiming Clinton had Ricky Byrdsong's "blood on his hands. Wayne again condemned H. Rap Brown, saying he should have been in prison, "and that's why I use strong rhetoric."
Tony then turned to Bruce Reed, a domestic policy advisor to President Clinton. Reed said the numbers LaPierre cited on prosecutions and convictions were just plain wrong -- and that gun murders are down, way down. Reed implied that there was room for improvement -- "who has the guns?" He said responsible gun owners were not the issue -- but crooks were. Should felons with guns be locked up? Reed said they already are -- and the Clinton Administration supports Project Exile. He added "the great lesson of the Smith & Wesson agreement is that this need not divide America...[they] made a courageous decision...if it's good enough for Smith a& Wesson, why isn't it good enough for the congressional leadership?" Will the Administration pursue more lawsuits against gun manufacturers? Reed didn't say no -- "we reserve the right," but there are other approaches under consideration.
Tony: would you be willing to invite LaPierre to the White House? Reed said he did not see the potential for any progress. Tony: but he said he wants to sit down with the White House! Reed: first, he has to apologize to Bill Clinton.
Can anyone say "impasse?" Say you're sorry, Wayne!
Tony then turned to the decision by the Vermont state legislature to allow civil unions for gay couples. Elizabeth Birch from the Human Rights Campaign pointed out that civil unions are a legal contract and should be called marriages. J.C. Watts -- didn't he father a kid out of wedlock? -- said that marriage should be between a man and a woman. Juan Williams asked Watts about job protection and insurance, essentially slamming the "Defense of Marriage Act." Birch mentioned that the DOM Act is unconstitutional. Tony: "But it was signed by Bill Clinton." Birch acknowledged that -- and should have mentioned the political particulars of that decision. But she did slam the current situation: "We tried separate but equal. It didn't work.... Mr. watts and his leadership cling to the topic of gay marriage because they know it resonates negatively... We don't have meaningful hate crime legislation." Watts lied: "I'm not here to discriminate against you." He pointedly parroted Tony, saying that Clinton signed DOM.
The rest of the segment was b-o-r-i-n-g. Not even Tony and Juan could get the momentum going. Birch doesn't exactly come across as animated -- and Watts's delivery was dull, dull, dull -- even when Juan fired away at him! Watts's one-note rhetoric was reminiscent of Gary Bauer at the Republican debates -- monotonous and sleep-inducing. No wonder he doesn't appear on the Sunday shows that much.
Jeez, Tony -- couldn't you at least have gotten Dick Armey? Sure, he's a "house hypocrite horndog," but a least he's a lot more lively than J.C.!
Panel time! Negative ads! Campaign's on! Brit: "they're not national -- just wait." Tony and Mara Liasson agreed that unlike McCain, Gore will be fast to respond. Juan said Bush is concerned about appealing to women voters. Hume slammed Gore and Bush for getting about equal grades at Yale and Harvard -- then got a laugh from us by saying it begs the question as to which school is harder.
Talk turned to the NRA; Mara said the attacks will help the NRA's membership and coffers -- but Hume implied the situation was a dilemma for the GOP. Juan said that Hillary Clinton has not spoken out about the latest police shooting because "she doesn't know what to say."
Wrong, Juan, she does -- and she's smart enough NOT to jump out and shoot from the lip a la Rudy.
There was some talk about the NRA "stalling" gun legislation, and the wizened pundits could not agree as to whether this year would yield gun legislation.
Chat turned to Iran -- and Juan tied it to the gas issue. They're missing the big story -- the warming relations between the US and Iran may yield some tremendously information on the GOP and the hostage situation.
The panel turned to Taiwan, tying the elections to mainland China, trade, and the WTO -- pointing out the complexity of the issue.
There was a quick discussion of the "candidate of the week," and both Hume and Juan said it was the reluctant Colin Powell.
We loved Tony's final word on circular firing squads: he slammed both the NRA and the Clinton Administration as he cited some selective stats. He said both sides were out of line. We don't agree -- but there's nobody we enjoy disagreeing with than Tony, who was relatively fair to the Clinton Administration this week on gun issues.
The McLaugh-In Group
Starring "Pope" John and His Screaming Ouch-Bishops!
Issue one: We Told You So! The Pope McLaugh-In blustered over "spiraling violence" in Kosovo, calling the situation a "shooting war" between Kosovars and Serbs. Now US troops are raiding Albanian strongholds -- "would you believe it?"
Like it's our fault, John -- and why no mention of your old friend Slobodan?
McLaugh-In mentioned Sen. John Warner's call for a withdrawal as he excoriated Clinton and Blair.
Question: will we see body bags?
OUR question: Wouldn't you love to see those body bags, John? We think you and Jack Welch would love to gloat over the dead bodies of our boys.
Michael Barone called it a real possibility; Eleanor Clift said that a multiethnic Kosovo is looking less and less like a reality; John Fund (the man many feel "killed" Vincent Foster with his lies in the Wall Street Journal) said that it could become an election issue, citing the possibility of body bags or hostages. Clarence page pointed out that foreign policy is not playing a big role in the political debate -- unless a region heats up. Eleanor said that Bush keeps saying there are too many US troops deployed abroad but "gets cagey" when asked about which he would recall.
Cagey? Try he has no idea, Eleanor!
At the end of a (not-so-hypothetical to John) first Bush administration, will troops still be in Kosovo? oh, please...
"Issue two: scapegoating guns!" John ran video bites of LaPierre and Clinton, ending with LaPierre's snide comment re. Ricky Byrdsong. John expounded on the Byrdsong murder. "Many believe LaPierre's argument goes to the heart of the problem -- that he does not prosecute gun crimes." John cited stats that show prosecutions and convictions down.
But do these stats apply to federal or state prosecutions?
John tried tying the issue to drugs and the breakdown of the family as he gave a biased picture of a shooting involving a first-grader.
John Fund committed a gaffe corrected by John -- saying the NRA says guns, not people, kill people, when he meant the reverse. John interrupted, and shouting ensued among the Pope and his "Ouch-Bishops" over a drop in violent crime and gun murders. "What about family structure? What about the entertainment industry? What about the drug culture?' Michael Barone slammed LaPierre for his Sunday comments -- and Clinton for exploiting the first-grader shooting. John "asked" if the focus "on guns -- by Clinton" is political.
Gee, John, LaPierre started this fracas with his extremist rhetoric? Eleanor sarcastically said, "guns don't kill people, six year olds do." John called the decision of smith & Wesson to put trigger locks on all guns "a great service."
Of course, many users will deposit these locks in the "circular file" the minute they get them home.
"Issue three: a passage to India!" The Pope fretted over nuclear proliferation and military friction on the Indian subcontinent, saying among other things that "the Pakistan government is illegitimate" and Clinton "has condoned" the government. Eleanor said that Pakistan wants this visit to go very well -- and that visiting an unstable region to offer help is "the right thing to do." Fund said that India would ask Clinton why he trusts China with nukes (he doesn't, John, you moron) and not India -- but then said that this would help with fail-safe mechanisms.
Pointless predictions!!
Michael Barone: Chen Shui-bian's good showing in Taiwan elections will "arouse more denunciations" from hardliners in Beijing.
Good showing? He won!
Eleanor Clift: "No Rapprochement between Bush and McCain until the Republican Convention. "
John Fund: There will be a five year moratorium without taxes on "Al Gore's invention," the Internet.
Got news for you, John -- without Al Gore, there would be no Internet as we know it -- you cretin!
Clarence Page: A prescription drug hits the floor of Congress before Easter.
John McLaughlin: McCain will endorse Bush at the GOP Convention -- "and then [proceed] to deliver an unforgettable speech on the need for comprehensive reform in American politics before an audience of exhilarated conventioneers. "
Face the Nation
Bob Schieffer's first guest: Energy Secretary Bill Richardson. Question one: when will prices drop? Richardson predicted late spring to early summer as he underlined a need to control price volatility. Bob asked Bill about his meeting with the Saudis, and Bill said that the Saudis said there should indeed be increases in production. What if it's not enough? Bill deflected, saying that he wants to meet with many foreign and oil ministers in other countries. Bob mentioned Rudy Giuliani's comments on FNS that the price increases "lie at the feet" of Bill Clinton -- and claimed that Richardson said "Clinton was napping!" Bill laughed -- and then said Rudy blamed Richardson personally for diplomatic parking problems!
A few minutes of wonkspeak about oil reserves and energy policy -- 'which is working" -- ensued. Richardson opposed the idea of offshore drilling in environmentally sensitive areas.
Bob's next two guests: the two congressional judiciary chairmen, Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Homewrecker-Adulterer) and Sen. Orrin Hatch (R-Rock Star-Songwriter). They were there to talk about "gun control" -- setting the stage by quoting Wayne LaPierre's comment about "sustaining a certain level of killing" and then running part of his interview with LaPierre on Wednesday: "I absolutely stand by those words." Bob asked Hyde for his reaction. Hyde: "I don't adopt it...people say things in the heat of combat and then find it hard to back away!"
One of our female staffers was roaring with laughter over that comment, shouting "Right! You're one to talk, Mr. Impeachment Mangler!" Hyde went on to denounce the statement "short of a personal condemnation, which I'll never make" -- words that once again show Hyde as the cowardly has-been he now is. Hyde whined about "trying to get a compromise on gun control legislation... getting trigger locks... a ban on large ammo clips, instant checks... I can't get people to sit down and negotiate with me."
Awwwww. Could it be a little credibility problem, Mr. Chairman? Could it be your own hypocrisy rebounding and biting you in the butt? Even your own party knows you're not the powerhouse you used to be. You had a chance to deal with the impeachment fiasco honorably. you let yourself get walked all over by the Neo-Nazi wing of your own party. You blew it.
Hyde slammed Sen. Lautenberg and praised NRA Democrat puppet John Dingell.
Schieffer turned to our favorite GOP senator, Orrin Hatch. Orrin talked about the Juvenile Justice act as a bit of "good' social engineering. Schieffer said that the bill still had trigger lock requirements. Hatch slammed the President for claiming he was the man behind the Brady Bill when Republicans backed instant check in that bill (not true). He slammed the Lautenberg amendment gun show "killer" -- where else can average Joes sell guns they want to get rid of? Schieffer ran part of one of the "Charlatan" Heston NRA ads in which Heston distorts the Clinton record. And Orrin said he wanted to see "this whole thing come down." So the NRA should pull these ads? Orrin mentioned the ads running against the NRA ads...
Hey Orrin, we have not seen one such ad! Anywhere! Even on the Internet! Send us some tapes, Orrin -- we'd love to see these ads -- if they exist, that is!
Orrin dropped a hint that a compromise may be workable under certain conditions. Orrin is a master politician, and his somewhat limited compromise offer on Face the Nation stands to put him in a position of greater power in the Senate. Yes, it's a crapshoot -- but Orrin's a canny political gambler.
And we have to say that Orrin was in great form -- he looked energized and enthusiastic, far more so than he had as a presidential candidate. Rock on, dude!
Schieffer's final word was on Hillary Clinton's appearance at a fund-raiser arranged by Pakistani-Americans -- and his beef was with the fact that Mrs. Clinton's staff made it clear that $50,000 was the "minimum" to guarantee Mrs. Clinton's appearance. Schieffer was astonished and not a little angry that candidates are "openly" naming their prices.
But the fact is that this practice has been going on for years. In fact, both parties do it -- and know that it's a powerful incentivization tool for hard-money fundraising.
As with every element of political fundraising, Bob, the "story" has its pros and cons -- and at least this practice, which is not illegal, is now out in the open. If anything, it will serve to inform the public as to who is attempting and often failing to "own" whom -- and which pols take the money and essentially screw their contributors!
Remember -- it's about access, baby!
Eat the Press
Fat Tim gets a new Haircut... Wayne LaPierre cinches his dismissal... Tom DeLay gets mellow... and Broder and Safire out-stupid each other!
Today, moron Wayne LaPierre, who won't keep his job for long at the National Rifle Association, told Tim Russert that Bill Clinton is responsible for H. Rap Brown's having killed of a Sheriff this past week.
Russert asked La Pierre whether he believes that Clinton and Gore tolerate murder for purely political purposes. Why Russert had this idiot on in the first place is the first question NBC should ask. LaPierre wouldn't apologize for saying earlier last week that Clinton lives off the blood of others, giving basically the same answer he gave to other blabmeisters this morning. "Ricky Birdsong's blood is on the President's hands," said LaPierre, in addition to his other manic-depressive uttering.
Mrs. Birdsong thinks LaPierre is a moron. Here's the "Wayne's World" logic: Bill Clinton can force the Congress to appropriate enough money to allow Janet Reno to prosecute hundreds of thousands of Brady Bill violations perpetrated every year. As a matter of fact, it is the State of Illinois, and all the other states, who have the responsibility to prosecute these crimes.
Russert began screaming at LaPierre, trying to force him to stand by his comments. Wayne wouldn't bite. Then Wayne attacked Reno, who could not promise Senator Hatch that she could increase prosecutions in this area. Pierre conned Russert. Russert began to scream again: “Why can't you say 'Yes' or 'No'?” Finally, Pierre said "I stand by my comments."
Russert then brought on Joe Lockhart, the Clinton Administration Press Secretary. Lockhart watched a tape of some idiot sheriff who said that President Clinton should "feel guilty" about Rap Brown's murder of his colleague.
Is Russert nuts First he is angry at LaPierre, then he shows this ludicrous tape of an NRA rotor. Lockhart said that LaPierre statements are sick. Lockhart also said that the silence by GOP politicians is even worse.
Lockhart made a bumbling effort to quote meaningless statistics and then finally quoted the right one: that gun crime is down 34% since Clinton took office. He also pointed out the Clinton put hundreds of more ATF agents on the streets to investigate gun crimes and that the GOP has refused to fund the positions needed to enforce fun laws -- because the NRA does not want these, their puppets, to interfere with gun manufacturers!
Of course, this week the largest gun manufacturer in the US, Smith & Wesson, turned on the NRA and LaPierre and agreed to voluntarily put trigger locks on all their guns. And that shows how effective that Wayne "LePew" really is: the NRA and the maniacs that run it should, forthwith, fire this intellectual midget so they can get their jackboot programs on track once again.
Lockhart then blamed the real culprits -- the GOP-controlled House -- because of massive amounts of money given these house members by La Pierre and his minions.
LaPierre then had the gall to tell Lockhart that the White House has the power to stop all this killing! LaPierre mentioned the Richmond "Exile Project" -- that he lied about and claimed the NRA sponsored.
Readers, there was not one true word in this. In fact, the program to enforce the gun laws in Richmond, Virginia was promulgated by a U.S. Attorney appointed by Clinton!
By the way, you might want to know that no police organization supports the NRA position on anything. Only a handful of individual moronic cops who have the minds of 5 year olds -- and often live in Mississippi, Idaho and other redneck states -- think the NRA is anything but a whore for gun manufacturers who are totally irresponsible and manufacture the types of guns used by felons: cheap guns.
Lockhart also pointed out that under the Clinton Administration gun criminals spend more than two years longer in prison than under the Bush Administration.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- why should they? In Texas, you can carry a weapon into Macy's thanks to BushBaby and his stupid ideas!
La Pierre's web site nra.org now claims that Smith and Wesson SURRENDERED!!! Then Wayne lied to Russert again and said that he supports trigger locks.
This cretin should be indicted and put away for a long time.
Russert then stupidly asked LaPierre what he could accept in the current White House sponsored bill. Hey Tim -- who cares what he supports? You helped prove he has no credibility, he will lose his job, and the House members who took his money will abandon him like the rats they are.
Goodbye Mr. Wayne "LePew" -- you are a goner. Have fun looking for a job.
Tom “The Hammer” DeLay was Tim's next guest. He claimed that the things LaPierre said about Clinton are said about him and his colleagues all the time! What DeLay failed to say is that in his case and that of some of his gun-happy GOP colleagues, the statement is true!
DeLay said that this country now has problems with children killing children. Of course, he lied again, since this problem has existed for centuries. There is nothing new about madmen killing groups of people in public places. Kids are no different; as a matter of fact, the first mass murder of children at a school was recorded in the early 18th century, in Morgan, Massachusetts.
Russert was sporting a new haircut today, which makes him look a little less FAT. The hair is much shorter -- but he now looks older as well. Russert gave DeLay more respect than the lying congressman deserves. DeLay said he does not want the 72-hour delay on buying handguns.
He also said that Clinton is appeasing rogue nations "all the time," but he could not give one example. He stammers “Kosovo” when Russert tries to pin him down, but did not explain.
Of course he didn't -- because he made it up.
He then called Clinton's position on China appeasement. DeLay refused to say that the US should defend Taiwan. DeLay said he would not allow China to push people alone. Of course, DeLay is a moron -- how would he stand up to China? He said he would put a missile defense system on our ships -- a program that the Clinton Administration backed and has set forward. Of course, if China attacked Taiwan, DeLay wouldn't do Jack Squat. He couldn't and he knows it. Russert made him look like the fool he is.
Russert then turned to gasoline prices. DeLay said we could cut taxes or use the strategic supply. Of course, BushBrat and his Daddy, who traveled to meet with oil honchos in Kuwait and other nations in the Middle East, caused this entire gas crisis and cashed in his IOUs for Desert Storm.
Make no mistake: it is the Bush family making money and getting votes on this crisis. They are responsible for this MAGIC and completely unpredicted and implausible rise in gas prices -- DURING THE WINTER!!! This has NEVER happened before.
BushDaddy is a crook -- plain and simple.
DeLay said that Bush should work with McCain. Wow, what a surprise! DeLay said he wants to get rid of the IRS -- yet he has done nothing to accomplish this.
DeLay then talked about the House Chaplain flap. A Catholic Priest got the most votes -- but none of the three members of the panel that Hastert picked, including Democrat Minority Leader Gephardt, wanted the Catholic. DeLay replied to Brother Tim the Catholic Russert that the priest in question will never become the House Chaplain.
We wonder whether the Bishop instructed Tim to ask this question.
Then Delay had us roaring with laughter as he said that if the election was held today the GOP would GAIN two seats! What a lie. If the election was held today the GOP would lose at least 15 seats in the House. Period. Come to think of it, DeLay had predicted a gain of some ten seats by the GOP back in '98 -- days before the Dems won back enough seats to narrow the majority margin to a mere five congressmen!
Following the break, Russert AGAIN made the mistake playing host to Nixon sycophant William Safire (Bill Shapiro) to debate the absolutely boring David Broder. We could have fallen asleep if we weren't after more fodder to use against Safire to get him removed from the Pulitzer Committee.
Amazingly, Russert had not insulted Clinton once to this point in the show. We suppose he has finally realized that having BushBaby as President would be worse than having Mussolini in the Oval Office.
Safire turned 70 years old this week. Thank God! How long could he go on writing? Broder said that the efforts of Democrats to stop the spread of guns have cost them seats in the past. Safire claimed that Bush distanced himself form the NRA “a little bit” this week.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- a little bit. Yeah, right. At least he knows damaged goods when he sees it.
Bush ran a commercial that said Clinton and Gore presided over a wreck of the public education system -- but remember that it was the House Republicans that wanted to disband the Department of Education and get rid of public schools.
Russert also showed a Gore commercial against Bush's education record which was great. Remember Bush has been governor of a state which ranks 49th in education, 48th as a good place to raise a child, and 45th in SAT scores.
Broder claimed that Bush looked better in those two ads, then stuck up for Bush by saying, “Anyone in Texas education will tell you that Bush has done very well in supporting improved education in Texas.”
Well, of course that's true, Broder -- you idiot! Would Texas educators say anything else? The truth is that Bush is too stupid to know what a good education is. He thinks is includes flunking out of Eastern Prep Schools and nearly flunking out of Yale.
Safire said he thinks that the American public will sicken of negative ads. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- is he dumb or what? Americans love attack ads, just like they love money, greed, Wall Street and the Mafia.
Broder mentioned that John McCain is the chairman of the Senate Commerce Committee -- and so he will stay on as a Republican. Broder basically called Safire a moron for saying that McCain was loved because of his stance on campaign finance reform.
Nothing could be further from the truth. People supporting McCain could not care any less about campaign finance schemes -- what they liked about McCain was that he tells the truth and he is war hero. Safire, get soaked!
Safire retorted that sooner or later it will change. Broder said it will because the CORPORATIONS are tired of ponying up $100 thousand contributions. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- now we have two morons! Do they really think that corporations think that $100 or $200 grand is too HIGH a price to pay to control the most powerful government in the history of the world?
We don't think so.
Broder and Safire were jockeying to eclipse each other in stupidity.
This Geek!
The show started the same way as always -- with "Spam Gonads-Gone" screaming into the microphone about the issues he and his sidemoron "Cockie Sloberts" would cover -- and lie about -- this week
We wondered out loud whether Cockie, a devout Catholic and daughter of two of the slimiest pols in American history (one of whom, the mommy, is now our Ambassadorette to the Vatican) would bring up the fact that a Catholic Priest won't get appointed as the House Chaplain.
First of all, the House shouldn't have a Chaplain -- this is clear violation of the separation of church and state provisions of the US Constitution. ABOLISH THE POSITION OF CHAPLAIN -- he takes up too much time intoning homilies on C-SPAN anyway, and makes the House look like its doing The Work of God when nothing -- nothing -- could be further from the truth!
Why This Geek hasn't been canceled, we'll never know.
One thing we can tell: even George Will has become sick of Sam and Cockie, their stupidity, and having to play " right wing foil" for Li'l Brutus -- George Staphylococcus -- every week. Mr. Will told a friend of ours from Palm Beach that he was seriously considering quitting the show very soon, if not earlier.
The idiots begin with the biggest loser of them all -- Charlatan Festoon (real name Ben Steinberg or some such), who went into a spiel about the sheriff "killed" by H. Rap Brown and blamed Clinton for the death.
Spam reminded Charlatan that Brown has not been convicted, let alone charged with the killing, then asked if Festoon agrees that the blood of former college basketball coach Ricky Birdsong was on President Clinton's hands.
Festoon said he thinks Americans don't want more gun laws -- but of course he is wrong. Americans hate guns and hate Festoon, who hasn't make a good movie since the 1950s -- and even those stunk!
Festoon is a loser -- a big-time loser who thinks he can rocket himself into yet another “D” picture deal like Soylent Green by touting guns for criminals. Don't walk near his house in L.A. -- he might shoot you if you're Black.
Even George W. thought that LaPierre and his "boss" Charlatan are idiots for verbally lynching Clinton over gun deaths.
Festoon is soooo stupid that he actually believes that most Republicans will stick with him and LaPierre. Here's what will really happen -- Festoon and LaPierre will be keeping company with each other either in court when someone sues them for their lies, or on Charlatan's tennis court shooting at lizards.
Festoon pointed out the Smith & Wesson is British owned and said he “is not comfortable with the British telling us what to do with our guns and our Constitution...we settled that in 1776.” Ha, ha, ha -- in fact, it was far later than that when we defeated the British. By the way, remember that "Charlatan" is a strictly British phony stage name, Ms."Festoon."
Festoon is the prefect sort of guest for Spam and Cockie. He sports an IQ under 90 and because of this, he can mentally duel and even eclipse Sam or Cockie at almost any turn.
Cockie asked whether Festoon will ask his members to boycott Smith & Wesson. Festoon “doesn't like to boycott people.” Ha, ha, ha, ha -- right, but what about companies?
Cockie then called the ATF the AFT. Festoon didn't correct her except to say ATF -- then Cockie woke up.
It was hilarious.
Spam asked Charlatan how many new members he has added this week -- Festoon said the membership is now at 33 million, then changes it to 3 million. Wow! Powerful! 1% of the population support this loser actor.
That was it for Charlatan -- we at American Politics Journal wish her the best of luck in the future as a has-been gun touter.
Spam and Cockie then welcomed "Independent" Counsel Bob Ray -- also known as Ken Starr II. Ray is supposedly a Democrat -- but registers as an Independent. Ray said there was no criminal activity that involve higher-ups in the White House or the First Lady in regard to the fake Filegate scandal.
Spam said that “Judicial Watch” -- the ridiculous organization funded by crazy Dick Scaife and nutball Larry Klayman that abuses the civil courts -- claims that Linda al de Tripp and others "witnessed thousands of e-mails" that used the FBI files for nefarious purposes.
Will wanted to know what the White House did with these files all the months they sat there. Ray told him that once those files were reviewed and found to have no purpose since they were about people who would not be coming to the White House any longer (Bush spies), they were put in a vault.
Will wanted to know why Ray hired two more prosecutors. Ray said there would be more. However, he said he is hiring these people to help him make the decision NOT to prosecute either of the Clintons. He specifically mentioned the President's role in the Lewinsky investigation (whether he tried to get her to lie.) Ray said this matter has not been closed. Ray said that the political issue has been put to rest, but the law has not been. Ray will continue his investigation -- until the President is vindicated, or not. “No person, including the President, is above the law.”
Uh, oh. Maybe Ray has a surprise in store for us.
No. He simply wants to extend his public persona in order to get a new and better job after this crap is over.
Spam wanted to know Ray's timetable. WE are concerned that Ray was once hired by none other than Adolf Giuliani! We wonder if he intends to release dirt on Hillary Clinton before the election for the US Senate in New York. If he does, he will be left in the same position as Starr and David Schleppers --- a loser in every way.
Ray said that he will conclude all his investigations within this year! Well, I guess that's the end of justice as we know it.
Senator Chuck Schumer, "Mr. Annoyed," was up next. Cockie asked him about the boring issue of gun control. Cockie accused the Democrats of blocking the gun control bill.
Of course they are --- the bill, which was written by the NRA for the GOP, is so full of loopholes that it would never work. The NRA put in the gun show loophole in the first place.
Schumer called Festoon “an out-of-body experience.” we loved it! He said that for Festoon to claim that the NRA supported the Brady Bill is a bald faced lie.
And it was.
The gun issue went on and on and put us to sleep.
Who cares? Whichever criminal or insane person wants a gun can get one. Nothing can stop them. For instance, every day in America, more than 3 million guns are for sale in the classifieds. So what the hell are all these liars on both sides of the political aisle talking about?
Will asked about Independent Counsel Ray. Schumer wanted to know why this is going on and why is he still trickling out reports. “I don't get why it takes five years to put out a report.”
Neither does anyone.
Schumer said he wants to know why Ray doesn't put these reports in a month. He can do his job by July 1st. Five years and $60 million dollars. Will asked the snotty question if Schumer was upset when Lawrence Walsh issued his indictments on the eve of the 1988 election, then asked whether the President could be indicted after he leaves office. Schumer thinks that the President has already been punished.
Will then turned too the price of gasoline. He said he wants to know if this has an effect on the economy. Of course it does, stupid! Fuel impacts all prices and causes rampant inflation. Don't you remember that, George? You were driving in the early 70s.
Then Cockie had a STUNNING interview with clear-thinker Gerald Ford. Ford was wise as usual. He told his GOP pals to wise up, embrace McCain, stop being crazy and ultra- right, and consider McCain as a running mate.
Cockie wanted to know if BushBaby was being pushed so far to the right that he just can't come back. Ford reminded Cockie that Reagan moved to the middle in 1980 to win and his right-wing nutball supporters stuck with him.
Ford said that he feels that Charlatan Festoon and Wayne LePew's NRA positions “are losers!”
We laughed hard and loud. Is anyone over at the NRA listening?
Cockie said that Ford was sharp as a tack. Well, coming from Cockie, that's no compliment. We love Ford and think he would have made a better Democrat. Even as an octogenarian, he is twice as smart as Cockie.
Now Staphylococcus began to defend George Bush and said he thinks Shrub is getting a “bad rap.” He thinks Bush said a lot of nice stuff about McCain. What? Brutus, we read that interview. Bush's hatred of McCain was tactlessly obvious. Will claimed that what shocked people was that Bush said he "doesn't care much about polls." another laugher from George -- Will, grow up.
What Bush said was, “Who cares about McCain? I won he lost.!” Cute, but no cigar.
So the four idiots of ABC sat around and talked about nothing -- losing another few thousand viewers to Meet the Press and Fox News Sunday. Cockie said McCain is following the "Reagan Model!" We couldn't stop laughing at that stupid "observation" -- McCain couldn't follow that model unless he woke up the dead!
Cockie said Gore and Bush and running "absolutely even" among Independents. Will said that Bush is "beating" Gore by 18 points among women over 18 with children. That is another laughable lie. All of the panel of fools agree that the race will be won with the independents. Ha, ha, ha -- well, boys and girls of This Geek, we just so hate to break the news to you, but all political races are won by whomever the independents or switchers vote for.
That is Politics 101. Cockie would have you believe this is her "deeply insightful opinion." Oh, please.
Can't ABC take a hint? They should bring back the only smart man they ever had on this show --- Bill Kristol. We hate his politics, but miss his wit and razor-sharp mind.
Instead you leave us with the Moron George Twins, Staph and Will.
Mark Lacey of the New York Times joined the idiocy. Lacey is a Black man and does us proud. Lacey talked to a lot of NRA members who used to consider LaPierre a “moderate” and don't shoot that well. Lacey thinks that LaPierre was shoring himself up among the really crazies in the NRA.
Staph then said the same thing. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- spoken like a true parrot. Lacey should have thrown George a cracker.
Will said Democracy is about two things -- numbers and intensity -- and Americans liked what LaPierre said. We were laughing again! Maybe you did, Will -- but the majority of Americans thing LaPierre and Festoon are certifiable.
Spam shifted “the battleground” to another topic: Jimmy Carter, oil and Ronald Reagan. Lacey said that Gore is worried about his gas price thing.
Well, of course, and that's why BushDaddy arranged for this crisis to occur with his buddies from the Carlyle Group. If you think this is a conspiracy theory, think again. Bush wouldn't have to ask -- all he has to do is mention that BushBaby is running and the Arabs would do anything to get another Bush in the White House for Desert Storm II.
Will said stupidly that gas prices are no higher than they were in the 1950s adjusted for inflation.
Cockie said she thinks the gas crisis is worse than ever for the Democrats.
Staph then attacked Hillary Clinton - - saying that the real problem is that Hillary simply wasn't telling the truth about the Travel Office, and that this is what Ray's report will say.
Nice stab in the back, Staph - - we'll remember that in the print edition.
That was it for the four losers and Mr. Lacey who made the others look dumber than ever.
CNN Lame Edition
Wolf Blitzer allowed the NRA's Wayne LaPierre to again make a fool of himself! Wolf asked Wayne if he stands by his words that Clinton "has blood on his hands." Catch this: LaPierre said he said it to "center the debate!"
Ha, ha, ha -- right, if you consider the Idaho Militia and gun-toting extremists to be the "center!"
LaPierre once again attacked Clinton, this time using H. Rap Brown -- on the run for shooting a cop. He then said he wanted to "center the debate" on the lack of gun prosecutions. As we've mentioned, LaPierre is essentially a liar -- his organization has vigorously lobbied to defund and defang prosecutors.
Wolf asked Joe Lockhart about why the government doesn't prosecute gun crimes -- and after Lockhart dismissed Wayne's "nonsense," he mentioned the drop in gun crimes, tripling of resources for prosecution, the origin of Operation Exile witha Clinton appointee -- and then Lockhart essentially said that LaPierre's statistics were a lie.
Lockhart should have gone into detail, citing the real facts. He also should have nailed the NRA for hobbling prosecution. But he did go after LaPierre for lying again -- hiding facts surrounding how H. Rap Brown got his gun (because prosecutors did not have a case in the first place).
We won't waste your time talking about Wolf's interview with Pat Buchanan, other than mentioning that Pat was critical of Wayne's "over-the-top" rhetoric -- and the "Clinton-Gore administration exploiting" the families of shooting victims.
Right -- like ol' Wayne-Bob didn't exploit the Byrdsongs.