April 23, 2000 -- WASHINGTON -- It was wall-to-wall Elian yet again.  

The press allowed allies of the American Gonzalez clan to run roughshod over Janet Reno and Bill Clinton -- but a surprising number of interviewees ranging from Jesse Jackson to Greg Craig to Eric Holder did a surprisingly thorough job of un-spinning the Miami Cuban community and the none-too-neutral talk show hosts.

Much was made of "that" AP photo -- a Border Patrol agent involved in the raid looking at Elian and Donato Dalrymple "hiding" in plain sight in a closet.

Well, we want to show you how the press failed to do their own homework.

"That" shot was one in a series of photos taken during the raid by AP cameraman Alan Diaz hiding in a bedroom with Elian and Donato.

Here are two shots from the series -- one of the Border agent first coming into the room, and the last in the sequence with Elian being handed over to the female agent:

Note that the room door is still on the hinges.  Tearing a door off the hinges isn't exactly a simple matter, if you've ever tried it.

A few hours later, Marisleysis Gonzalez conducted a tour of the same room.  She tearfully claimed the door had been torn down.

Hey Marisleysis, pictures don't lie.  You tell us -- just how did that door get there?

Oh, well, you've gotta hand it to the Gonzalez clan -- at least they do know a few things about set dressing!

Too bad they've been busted by Ampol!

And now, the words of wisdom from your favorite spinmeisters:

Fox Noise Sunday
Is Roger Ailes Dubya's Stealth Press Secretary?

FNS is broadcast on the FOX Network, but is produced at the Washington studio of the FOX News Channel.  Our pal Bartcop pointed out an interesting facet of the latter's coverage of Elian's liberation yesterday:

Just before 6 AM EST this morning, the Fox News banner read, 
"ELIAN REMOVED FROM RELATIVE'S HOME" 

When the hateboys got to the office it suddenly changed to
"ELIAN SEIZED IN RAID ON RELATIVE'S HOME,"

"Three minutes of bedlam... is this how the government defends the family?"

You bet it IS, Tony, but we pretty well knew what the FOX answer would be, since Roger Ailes' toadies had loaded the FNS guest roster with with anti-Juan Miguel, anti-Reno Miami Cuban sympathizers.  "Fair and balanced?"  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!  Nonetheless, Tony Snow covered a lot of ground -- and even surprised us with a segment featuring Jesse Jackson and Rep. Jose Serrano (D-NY) which would show Tony and his guests at their finest.

Guest one: Jose Garcia Pedrosa, a lawyer for Elian's Miami relatives, who said that negotiations were still going on when the raid occurred!  Hilarious -- anyone who has been following this story in any depth knows the family was not negotiating in good faith, and even Tony pointed this out, quoting Eric Holder!  The best Pedrosa could do was to claim that Reno was "moving the goalpost" and say that the family was devastated.

Are negotiations with DOJ off now?  Pedrosa used words like "betrayed."  Tony: "Were there guns in the house?"  Pedrosa spun the transparently set-up photo of the Border Patrol shot of Donato -- just what was he doing in the Gonzalez house at 5AM with a 6-year-old boy? 

Tony, he was using Elian as a human shield.

Tony turned to Connie Mack, who spouted the GOP party line about a "tragic day" and said "there is no excuse for pointing a gun at the head of a 6-year-old."

Connie Mack, you are a LIAR and FRAUD.  The Border Patrol agent was NOT pointing that gun at Elian's head.  PICTURES DON'T LIE, like YOU do.

Mack claimed that the Clinton Administration "has not done one thing in the boy's interest" and claimed Castro was manipulating the situation.  Even Tony thought Mack was going over the top -- and said that reuniting Elian and Juan Miguel was in the boy's best interest.  Mack LIED AGAIN by saying the American family had not manipulated the situation, and cited the wacky Sister Jean as saying taking Elian away from the Miami family would be traumatic.

Yeah -- like Sister Jean has a Ph.D. in psychology.

Mack said that "hardhearted" Reno sought to "strip away every right of the [American Gonzalez] family."  We know that Mack gets a lot of support from Cuban-Americans -- so much, in fact, that they are pulling his strings.  Mack demurred when talk of demanding Reno's resignation came up -- if you call a stream of Reno-bashing "demurring."

Mack concluded by claiming the DOJ and INS "caved" to Castro.

The next guest -- subintellect Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, the congresspuppet for the Gonzalez community.  Tony asked her about guns, and Ileana spouted about all the religious icons in the house, adding "This family is armed with love."

Ha, ha, ha -- right, including that six-foot crucifix on the front lawn that screams "We want you to believe we're the most religious Catholics on the planet!"  Does the word "ostentation" mean anything, Ileana?

The spin came fast and furious from the physically and intellectually diminutive Congresswoman, who claimed that the Gonzalez family had been compliant and manipulated.

Well, they were -- by leaders in the Cuban-American community.

Tony: "Reno says that she wants to retire in South Florida, do you think she'll be welcome?"  At first we thought Tony was up to his wicked ways, but the truth is that he had set up Ileana to say how much the Cuban-American community loathed Reno (she did so in not-so-veiled words).

This was interesting -- Tony may be no fan of the Clinton Administration, but the way in which he was pressing the issue of guns in the Gonzalez house and Reno's not being welcome cut both ways.  We think Tony's more aware of the huge record of violence emanating from Cuban extremists in the Miami community -- a history of bombings and murder that makes the Black Panthers look like the Camp Fire Girls.

Tony's next guests: Jesse Jackson and Jose Serrano.  Jackson recounted his efforts to mediate the Elian situation between Juan Miguel and the American relatives.  Jackson seemed to support Reno's position.  Tony pointed out that the family was "negotiating" when officials moved in -- but that is not true.  They may have been on the phone, but DOJ considered negotiations over.  Period.

Jackson brought up the issues of the Cuban embargo and aid to Cuba.

Tony brought up an unrealistic scenario of Castro separating Elian from his dad -- and Serrano slammed Tony!  He called the claim Cuban-American propaganda, pointing out that Juan Miguel is a superstar in Cuba, beloved by the nation and Fidel!  Jackson called for more ties to Cuba and a "process of building bridges," pointing out America's history of getting opposing forces to talk.

Juan Williams brought up that photo.  Jackson was supportive of the DOJ decision, and said that if the law "must be enforced in a military way," so be it.  This guy used to be a radical?  And Serrano pointed out that the Miami city mayor Carollo refused to support government intervention.  Juan asked what might happen if Elian gets asylum, and Serrano pointed out that a Haitian or Dominican kid would be booted.  Juan: Elian signed for asylum!  Jose: Elian denounced his dad on Spanish-language TV!  Juan: Greg Craig is manipulating him!  Jose: the cops who refused to help Reno arrested a kid and had him sent back to Jordan -- and how about the violence of parading him around in front of cameras (for example, after Nazi thug Burton subpoenaed him)?

Jackson pointed out the double standard of allowing "wetfoot" Cubans instant asylum and driving Haitians away.  Serrano said that if Elian gets residency, so should 11 million people in America who want to become citizens -- and Mack should support his amendment that would make it so.

The back and forth in the segment was great.

Were there other ways to rescue Elian?  The usually dignified Utah Senator Orrin Hatch and Oklahoma Governor Frank Keating were the guests.  Tony asked Keating if the negotiations would have been taped (hoping that the tapes would "prove" the Gonzalez family what flim-flammed by Reno herself!) -- and Keating said "Happy Easter!"  He denounced "crashing in" on Elian.  Brit said that the DOJ had the legal right to do it -- and Keating brought up Waco.  He called it "the last recourse" and claimed that negotiations were going on.  Orrin called the raid "bad judgment at the White House," putting him in agreement with the 8% of Americans who blindly hate Bill Clinton.  He talked about "assault[ing] the house with automatic weapons."

Orrin, wake up -- you may make idiots think the house was riddled with bullet holes!  The house was "assaulted" with battering rams, and ONLY when the Gonzalez thugs refused them entrance.  Orrin talked about "procedure" for asylum, and sounded desperate, stumbling over his own words.  It was not Orrin at his best.  Tony blundered, putting Waco and the Gonzalez raid in the same sentence -- and Orrin slammed Greg Craig, "the President's lawyer" (as well as Juan Miguels's).  Tony -- bravo! -- pointed out that Craig is also Aleksander Solzhynitzin's attorney.

Brit Hume fumed -- pointing out that the Gonzalez family defied a legal order.  How would Keating handle it?  Keating spouted some lengthy pap about "work[ing] it out....you can't fault the Gonzalez family...who's calling the father's shots?"

Oh, we see, if Castro might be calling the shots, family values are moot!  Thanks for the clarification, Keating!  Who's giving you your pap -- Inhofe?

Orrin said he believes in the sanctity of the family, but that Juan Miguel has not been given a chance to speak freely.  Really, Orrin?  Where's your proof?  Not flimsy evidence, but proof?  Did you ask Janet Reno and other officials who got a  chance to talk alone with him?  Orrin then -- stupidly -- asked "Where's Al Gore on this one?"

Orrin, we'll clarify: Gore said this should be dealt with in family court, and he's focusing on real issues.

Panel time!  Mara said that the situation is "horrible" for Al Gore, trying to capitalize on Orrin's spin and saying that this rather minor issue raises questions about his being the most effective Veep in history.  Brit Hume claimed that Greg Craig was "in cahoots with the Administration," and that Craig had sent a warning letter to the networks that the Gonzalez family was planning some sort of media stunt, which is "proof" that Craig worked with Clinton and Reno.

Now this is telling -- it sounds to us more like Craig preemptively called FOX News on its unbalanced, unfair spin tactics, and had gotten wind of the possibility that Lazaro may hide a cameraman or two in his house -- and Brit resents it.

Too bad, Brit.  You distort -- we deride!

Brit further claimed that "it is manifestly clear that this was not about the welfare of a boy."   Cue the laugh track -- if Clinton does something even remotely in support of family values, it's immediately about politics!

In his final comments, Tony played up visions of "snatching a frightened child from his rescuer" while subtly deriding pictures of Juan Miguel and Elian smiling.  He even managed to get Monica Lewinsky's name in!  Bottom line -- Clinton's enemies in the media realize that their negative coverage of the raid isn't taking.

The McLaugh-In Group
Is the Mad Pope of Punditry Going Senile?

We say he is... because he did not start with Elian.  Doesn't he want ratings?

Issue one: the Presidential battleground and running mates for Shrubya.  John looked at the possible qualifications: succession, geography, ideology, race, gender, religion, military service.  John cited John McCain, Tom Ridge, Christie Whitman, Colin Powell and Liddy Dole as running mates for Bush Baby.

Barone said McCain isn't going to run; Eleanor said he lacks the subservient gene!  Tony said Ridge is very impressive, for a key state that could go wither way, with tons of qualifications, and he's a helluva guy.  Pope John brought up Ridge's pro-choice leanings -- and his specific views.  Could Bush pick Ridge?  Larry O'Donnell said maybe.  John insisted on "look[ing] at Powell" -- a waste of time, because he'll never get it -- if only because of the CCC wing of the GOP.  Larry said Powell would make it a landslide for Bush.

We disagree -- Powell has negatives that most members of the public are unaware of, and would plummet in the F scores were he to be a candidate.  Tony pointed out that his wife objects to his running.  Larry said that McCain's "renegade" status is a "new" phenomenon -- and he's wrong.  GOPers have hated McCain for because of his independent streak and outspoken nature.

There was a lot of nonsensical pap before they turned to Dole -- Eleanor said that it depends on her F scores and she sees no chemistry between Bush and Dole.

John Kasich, Chris Cox, Fred Thompson, George Pataki, Tommy Thompson -- which are realistic?  Larry said none.  Eleanor said Cox would be a fascinating choice -- young, smart, tech-oriented.

Right, Eleanor -- and the author of a report so full of factual errors he has ZERO credibility.

Barone and Tony talked Kasich.  We agree with Tony -- Kasich is a very smart cookie who would prove a formidable running mate -- and a solid candidate once Bush has to pull out of the race due to scandals.  John expressed surprise that Barone did not see Pataki as realistic, claiming -- WRONGLY -- that Pataki has "no skeletons."  Tony said Pataki will not deliver New York -- and John retorted WRONGLY that Rudy is running strongly.

With Patrick Dorismund as his running mate, John!  Well, he actually is running strong -- away from his wife Donna Hanover, who has reportedly left him for good and is appearing in the very funny one-woman show The Vagina Dialogues off Broadway in New York!

Five more: John Ashcroft, John Engler, Connie Mack, Dick Cheney, Frank Keating.  John had to be mad mentioning John Ashcroft -- an intellectual lightweight and wimp who is a walking joke in his own party -- and Frank Keating, who keeps harping on the Waco debacle.

John then named Bob Graham, Dick Durbin, Dianne Feinstein, Bill Richardson, and Evan Bayh as Gore running mates.

Barone said Graham solves the "Clinton Fatigue" problem.  We laugh every time we hear the words "Clinton fatigue" -- if there were no 22nd amendment, Clinton would win against Bush by 64%-36% according to our own party-weighted poll!  Barone's the one suffering from Clinton fatigue -- Barone's credibility is exhausted!  The rest of the speculation was dull -- until John said that Richardson is the obvious choice.  Tony agreed, because Richardson is "half Hispanic" -- but that Gore would go for someone like Feinstein.

John then named Bill Bradley, Joe Lieberman, Gray Davis, Kathleen Kennedy-Townsend.  Larry said that Davis would -- if he wanted to run.  John said he does not believe that Davis is being honest when he said that he does not want to run.  John claimed that Kennedy is a "dull campaigner."

Another group of names: Bob Kerrey, Jim Hunt, Russ Feingold, Frank Raines, Dennis Archer.  Larry said Kerrey is "on the short list already."  Right, Larry -- the short list of space-alien lookalikes!  Tony said Kerrey is "the only realistic name" among the five.

There was a little discussion of what the most important qualification for being a VP candidate was -- and the consensus was "don't drag down the ticket!"  Gee, what a stretch!

Final predictions!
Barone claimed that Clinton will secretly pardon himself and bring it out if and when he is indicted after he leaves office!  Ha, ha, ha! 
Clift predicted that Congress will pass normal trade relations with China.  What a stretch. 
Blankley predicted Republicans will pass minor gun control. 
Larry forecast a GOP tax bill that -- if it passes Congress -- will not eliminate the marriage penalty.
Mad John pointed out that "[f]or two weeks in May, six of the nine planets of our solar system will be in
alignment. Many predict a catastrophic shift in the polarity of the Earth, wiping out most of mankind."  In a major stretch for the Mad Pope of Screaming Punditry, John McLaughlin predicted that there will be no catastrophe.

Eat the Press
Russert takes aim at Holder, shoots self 

Tim Russert began his hour of pap talking about -- what else? -- Elian Gonzalez, and immediately put up the picture snapped by Lazaro Gonzalez' invited AP photographer, Alan Diaz, who was waiting in Elian's bedroom to take pictures designed to make the government -- who were forced to take this action by the Gonzalez family -- look as bad as possible.

How stupid do they think Americans are? How did this photographer gain access to the home by stealth and just happen to be in a locked room -- illegally locked against the federal forces, by the way?

The answer is simple. The Lazaro Gonzalez family set up the entire thing. They knew they had lost their meal ticket, Elian, and now they needed to stretch the story as far as they could to keep the money flowing to them as it has for the past five months from a variety of sources. Janet Reno was forced into this action - purposely. Period.

True to form, they immediately got dressed and rushed to Miami Airport only a few hours behind little Elian's private jet. They were desperate. They needed that money their little gold mine Elian provided and, yes, they had grown to care for him -- much as a prison guard begins to make relationships with the criminals he guards.

Russert welcomed the top crook of the ultra-right wing of the Republican Party and House Majority Whip Tom DeLay, who spent most of his time this term with Newt Gingrich banging hookers on Newt's "Poontang Express" Card, which they used wildly all over the country and in Latin America -- showing the charges for the girls as "food and entertainment." DeLay said that Reno and Clinton got together to batter this boy and destroy his mind. Delay then told some stupid story about his own arrest by Castro! He said (as we laughed out loud) that the line of soldiers that escorted him and his family to a waiting room stunk, and that he will never forget the stink of those Cuban soldiers.

Sound familiar? Like that old Klan line about how the skin of Blacks "smells bad?" That's all you need to know about DeLay's story.

Assistant Attorney General Eric Holder told off DeLay and called him a liar. Holder said that not only was there a federal judicial ruling and a warrant (DeLay lied and said there was not) but that Holder hopes that Delay calls him as a witness when DeLay and his cronies start their latest Witch Trial hearings.

Delay continued to lie and said that "it is still up in the air" as to whether Janet Reno acted illegally. The legal basis, he claimed, was the INS administrative determination that this action must be taken, and that this is the first time that a government agency has invaded a family home without a court order.

Sure, Tommy-Bob -- tell that to the IRS who not only invade homes without warrants but also seize property without due process. DeLay is a liar.

Now, we do agree that the police should not have taken the child himself with such an onerous weapon within his sight. This was stupid. Also, we had felt that the female agent should have gone into the room -- backed up by the armed force. We thought that was bad planning by the Border Patrol...

...until THIS picture surfaced TODAY on the AP web site, showing Elian being handed to the woman by Donado. She entered AFTER the Border Patrol agents had swept the room.  The Border Patrol agent's weapon is DOWN.  The crisis had been defused in SECONDS.

Funny how this photo NEVER surfaced on FOX News Channel, MSNBC or CNN.

Isn't it?

Assistant Attorney General Eric Holder told Russert that all the rumors about Elian being drugged on the plane were ridiculous.

Holder should have asked why the Gonzalez family trusted Elian with the fisherman "in the closet!" One of our interns, who is openly gay, was watching the news coverage in our media room yesterday -- and said he gets "a major Gaydar alert" every time he sees Donado!

Manny Diaz, loser attorney, said an attorney named Aaron Podhurst, a brilliant Miami attorney and friend of Janet Reno, had proposed an agreement and Diaz said that they signed it. Greg Craig, who was there as well and is Elian's Dad's attorney, told the real story: that the Lazaro Gonzalez family wanted to live in some "compound" in Miami where they would all live with Elian and his dad for months. Craig said that his side never believed that this family would give up the boy, and in fact they said just that on Friday afternoon. In other words, the Gonzalezes of Miami was presenting a fraud and doing it for the all the whacked-out Cuban-Americans who think they can run US Foreign Policy from their little slum called Little Havana from which they launch there hateful attacks on any politician who doesn't toe their line and bombing campaigns against media and businesses that don't follow their dictates.

Remember, these people think that Batista -- a real murderer and criminal who was overthrown by Castro with a nod from the US -- is a hero. And by the way, more than 130,000 of these so-called Castro-haters fly over to Cuba every year to spend money there and have fun in Cuba.

The Gonzalez clan are in negotiation for film and book rights for their story. That is, in the end, what this is all about.

Craig said after seeing father and son together yesterday, the boy was happy immediately in the arms of his father, something should have been accomplished months ago.

That's right.

Russert then brought on Michael Jordan for a love fest. It was boring. Is Russert trying to make his stinking show into a news magazine like "Date-Lame NBC?" Does he want to host the next 60 Minutes? Well, he'd be great at it. If you've seen "The Insider," the story of how CBS destroyed Dr. Jeff Wiegand, the man who told America how tobacco companies were poisoning them and their children, you know what Russert and NBC would be quick to do to anyone who threatened their financial health.

Jordan, sporting what looked like a three carat diamond earring in his left ear, sat there waxing non-eloquent about his new role in management. Yes, he's a nice guy -- but who cares? We don't watch Eat the Press to look at Russert giggling in glee just watching Jordan. We thought Russert was dreaming for sleeping with Michael as his latest fantasy. You couldn't wipe the smile off his fat face. He didn't have the same smile when interviewing the voluptuous snake Peggy Noonan.

Russert and Jordan by, by the end of the interview, had everyone in America asleep.

Forget it, Tim -- there is nothing credible about you -- especially in this arena.

This Weak!
The panel of losers at their worst-- except for George Staphylococcus

Our good friend Gene Lyons was a bit peeved that we dared to call Sam Donaldson "Spam" and Mary Martha Corinne Morrison Claiborne Boggs Roberts (a.k.a. Cokie Roberts) "Cockie."

So we've decided to change their Pundit Pap nicknames to Scam and Chokie.

Scam: because that is what he perpetrates on our readers and American viewers.

Chokie: because Mary Martha Corinne Morrison Claiborne Boggs Roberts makes us gag.

Scam opens not with the picture of the gun to "Little Jesus Elian," but with the lady INS agent carrying him to the safety of his father and away from the psychotic users in Miami.

Chokie said she wants to know how Elian is adjusting (such concern -- for ratings) and what Clinton will do now. Huh?

"The Saga of Elian," says Scam.

Chokie was actually in Miami -- we are sure to get a tan. She told us that the Pro-Batista Cubans are going to have a "general strike" on Tuesday.

What does that mean? No more lousy Cuban food? No more Cubans lined up at the welfare windows?

Kendall Coffee -- one of the approximately 3,000 loser lawyers who "volunteered" to work for these nuts full time without pay -- was the first guest. He wants the "AMERICAN" family to take care of the baby and to have Elian's "TREATING PSYCHOLOGIST" helping him. Ha, ha, ha. He then added that he is worried that Fidel will be "controlling" Elian like a puppet or robot.

Yeah, sure, Coffe -- that's all Castro has on his mind.

Kendall said he was on the phone still asking the Justice Department to listen to his tripe -- "I couldn't believe it until I smelled the tear gas." What tear gas? He said he heard MarySlayUs screaming and saw Elian's friend who had been hit with tear gas, and claimed the people in the Cuban community don't believe that Janet Reno was not in charge. They now want to say Greg Craig was in charge!!!!

What a laugh! We're surprised that they don't say Clinton was running the show.

Then Coffee said that the picture of Elian looking elated with his Dad show his smile with a tooth he did not have and with longer hair than when he left.

Now that had us rolling on the floor in the media room! I see... the government put up a phony picture of Elian taken a year ago in Cuba! Good try, MarySlayUs -- could this be more hysterical?

By the way -- did any of you see the psycho Cubans with the little rubber baby dolls nailed to wooden crosses with blood spattered all over it? This is the group that claims to protect Elian? And how about the trash bags pinned to the American Flag? Are these Americans, or Cubans who think they deserve to own Cuba?

Scam then welcomed Rev. Joan Campbell, who saw in the photo a wonderful relationship with Elian and his father and Elian's little baby brother. This was not manufactured love (like at the Miami Gonzalez family shack). This is very content, happy, mischievous little boy. She wondered why the family in Miami is not happy that Elian is happy. Juan Miguel was not worried to discipline the little punk. He said "Elian!" when he was goofing off and the child simply stopped what he was doing and went on to more acceptable activity. Elian was comforting his baby brother. The Miami relatives think that Juan will try to get out of the USA and flee to Cuba.

We hope he does. What's the point of going through this sham court argument?

Scam said he wants MarySlayUs and Mr. Multiple DUI "LazyJoe" to visit. Joan said this is Juan's call, not hers. When they are down at the Wye Plantation, then we'll see.

Eric Holder was next. We suppose Chokie went off to lay around the pool.

Scam read statements by two of the biggest losers in American Government, Senate CCC Majority Leader Trent Lott and House Whip Tom DeLay. Holder called them Monday morning quarterbacks -- which they are, always. He added that the raid was done professionally, no one was hurt, and Elian suffered little trauma. Scam showed the picture of the officer with the gun. Now, we feel it was stupid for Holder to defend this picture. He should have talked about how this picture was taken -- by a planted AP photographer trying for a Pulitzer, which he will probably get, in the same manner as the undeserving Maureen Dowd.

Scam is so stupid that he actually asked Holder why they were on the phone negotiating and then stormed in.

Well, Scam, that was the idea. Throw them off, so they could not assemble their own arms and barricade the house -- or take the boy away to a secret place or to another country. The phalanx of lawyers, the Miami Gonzalez family and everyone involved -- including the ballerina fisherman -- were had in a legal law enforcement action, accomplished just as the police often do. They let the delusional morons think that they are winning and then crash right in and get what they must.

Scam again demonstrated his idiocy by asking whether Holder is comfortable being praised by Castro. Holder basically showed what an idiot Scam is.

Scam wondered how the courts will decide on asylum. Holder said he thinks that six-year-olds cannot decide to seek political asylum without the assistance of their parents.

This was the longest 23 minutes in television.

Chokie then welcomed Bob Graham, whom she characterized as a Democrat who is negative about what happened. Well, of course! Without the 2 million votes of Cubans in Florida, Graham cannot be reelected.

Graham said the President promised him -- three weeks ago -- that there would be no invasion of the home as there was last night. Of course, Graham didn't mean a word he said. What actually happened in the Oval Office was that Clinton and Graham made a deal: Clinton wouldn't get angry if Graham posed as a disgruntled Senator going against his own party's President. That was the deal -- not what Graham is claiming. The President, on the other hand, agreed not to chastise Graham and not to address the agreement so as to make Graham look good to his psycho-Cuban constituents.

That is the way the game is played in the Beltway. It's called politics.

Now Chokie, who comes from one of the most crooked Lou'siana political families, knew damn well this was the deal -- but she did not even question him about it.

That is typical of the pap that Scam and Chokie feed you every Sunday morning.

Scam welcomed Walter Dellinger, former solicitor general in the Clinton Administration, and the brilliantly evil Arlen Specter to argue about what should happen next. Specter said he wants the Senate Judiciary Committee to look into the propriety of the government breaking into the Gonzalez house in Miami and the professional conduct used in the operation. The way this happened was "shameful," said Specter. The house, he argued, could have been surrounded by police, and the police entering the house could have used handguns hidden in their pockets. Dellinger said that Janet Reno learned that a great show of force was needed to allow them to get out in a couple of minutes and no need to fight their way out from a crowd surrounding their homes.

George Will asked some stupid question based on the fact that 40% ofd Americans have guns in their homes. So what? That is why police and federal law enforcement officers use these same tactics in all raids. Even in Beverly Hills. This is the way to stun people into cooperation. It worked. Even so, one man threw himself in front of the door and had to be forcibly removed. What if he had had a gun? Sure, it looked horrible -- but the psychology was what was at work here.

Dellinger made an utter fool of Specter, saying that he thought Specter's hearing was a great idea and that it would show that the decisions made were proper, legal and best for the child. He also pointed out that there was never any argument about custody and that no court would decide that some second and third cousins and a great uncle would have the foundation to challenge a father's custody of his own son.

Following the break came Scam and Chokie's "Ground Round Table". George Staphylococcus shocked us, saying he agreed with Reno. George Pill lied and said that "LazyJoe" Gonzalez had not been violating the law.

But he had. Also, it has come out that MarySlayUs told the Justice Department on Friday, "You think we only have people here, you are wrong...." This was a direct threat to the well-being of the police and Elian. Reno had no choice. And the AP picture is the fault of the Gonzalez family, who trumped it up. Pill said the climate for this despicable action was "set up by the press" who "painted Miami as a banana republic."

Well, George, let us set you straight: Miami IS a banana republic, and we ought to do something about that.

Chokie said that Bob Graham's grandson said, "Papa, is that gonna happen to me? Are they gonna take me away in the night?" Sure. And butterflies have lips.

Reminiscent of other lies we've heard in the past from right wing neurotics, George Pill, who should know better, is now defending a bunch a Neo-Nazi Cubans who would float over to Cuba and kill tens of thousands of innocent Cubans just to overthrow Castro and take back THEIR land.

George Pill called the Council of Churches a disgraceful supporter of dictatorships. Ha, ha, ha, ha -- Pill is flipping out again. Must have a headache.

Chokie said she is "horrified" by the Elian gun picture. Chokie and Will agreed that the Play-Doh offered to Elian to wither his "trauma" was the worst! What a laugh! What about the Real-Dough you both steal from ABC stockholders putting on this pathetic show?

Kudos to Staphylococcus for sticking up for Reno and Clinton -- and shouting down the deluded George Pill.

Then -- get ready to laugh! -- the best thing happened. Chokie -- whose mother is a political hack and now Amabssordoress to the Vatican -- went to a Cuban Church, where she claims that everyone waited for any word about Elian (ha, ha, ha) and the bishop then interrupted the singing to say they should pray "for the nino" (oh, puh-leeeeze), and then the singing commenced once again under a painting of the "old Cuba" (an oligarchic dictatorship engaged in slavery and worse) that each of these people think could disappear with the disappearance of little Elian (pathetic)!!!!

Has Chokie really lost it this time?

That was it for This Weak.

CNN Late Edition
Blitzer lets Craig blast naysayers

Wolf Blitzer's first guest was Greg Craig.  They covered the same ground as Tim Russert -- but with one addition.  Blitzer brought up rumors that the shot of Elian and his dad smiling were a fraud (rumors on certain fascist-apologist web sites and bulleting boards claim that Cuba fabricated the pictures).  Craig, who had been there, said the pictures were taken with a disposable camera.

So much for conspirawackos.

Blitzer also brought up the matter of the Lazaro faction having brought a basket for Elian.  Craig said it was more important for Elian to be with his direct family.  We hope that Craig accepted the basket -- and checked it for poisoned candy or remote-controlled explosives.

We ignored one of the Gonzalezes innumerable lawyers (we've lost track of their names) and tuned back in for INS Commissioner Doris Meisner, who detailed the Lazaro clan's failure to cooperate and live up to their word, the opinion of psychologists, and the coordination of Elian's liberation with DOJ.  Wolf said that a lawyer claimed that talks were continuing when the raid occurred (their favorite spin point), and Meisner said that at 3 AM -- the deadline -- there seemed to be a chance of success, but talks failed and the rest is history.  Meisner did a superb job of explaining the issue of unlawful restraint as applied to Lazaro's refusal to release Elian.  Wolf pressed 'guns and gas masks... [and] fear of guns in the crowd... is there any evidence there were guns in the house or in the crowd?"  Meisner set the issue straight -- firearms are not used by law enforcement unless they are fired upon.  She then critiqued the much-hyped AP photo in more detail than Janet Reno did yesterday.  Did the INS give Elian any medication?  "Absolutely not."

Hey Doris -- you should have added that the PRESS must be on drugs not to have caught the Gonzalez clan "stage managing" their decor!

During the round table, Steve Roberts made a horse's ass of himself saying that lunatic Senator Connie Mack "had a point" about Clinton not being for family values.  Rich Lowry spun the 11th Circuit Court decision and LIED when he said that the Administration "ignored" it -- "the government shouldn't be in our bedroom."

That got a laugh from the entoire Ampol staff!  Tell that to Kenneth Winston Starr, Lowry!